I'm sorry but i love u

blogy...I'm so sry tat I abundant u for long time liao....I noe u the only one who wont mad at me....I wan to say..Happy belated new year...valentine..Chinese new year n much more.. n i lov u more than anybody..
Lately I been busy for my study..I noe tis sem even more worse..last sem is lik a training o preparation for this sem...haih...but still when I'm lonely o happy...I will think bout u..Do u?? tis is lik a hell for me...but i try to work hard on it...I consider myself doin not very well for the previous sem...hopefully tis sem can pass..
I wanted to tell u my everything but time consuming...I hope u understand me...i noe u wil un me. tats y i luv u so much...u been always open d door for my...
today is a moody day..everybody is telling me bout his/her feeling...but did i ever tell them mine too?? I hope i can..but i cant do it..dunno why...I only can tell u
..Relationship wit bf is unstable lately ..and i dunno y...fall in luv wit someone???..How if i say yes...but it does not effect my life coz is impossible...well dbsk is my lover but lately they gone in my life coz I noe tat i only will coz them trouble...i noe u noe wat i mean...In luv wit somebody around me??? ya..i do lik someone but tat i noe is impossible coz it never success till now...so wat for put hope on it..as long i enjoy it then is ok liao....Who PM???I even cant un myself sometimes..betray myself??? dunno...hurt myself...mayb..
feel lik waiting someone to help me get rid out from the hole...i always feel so n now i'm waiting someone who can understand me n help me out..but tat person never seen...who can really understand me..I hope someday there someone there for me..Who in luv wit me?? only myself even my bf i hope is not...y?? coz i think he might find d wrong person coz i am....
i'm tired of controlling ppl life n my life..I can giv up others but not mine...mine is to help control the others....wat shud i do...i try to cry but it not gonna works...y nobody can un me..am i a freak for u.....look at me lik a freak....y they can be so popular n why i'm always wit those ppl..n it hurt so bad although i get used to it....I din get any benefit except see how their life goes on... I'm happy to noe them although they might forget bout me....Tq for those who appreciate me...My kind of ppl..for the moment i only find a few....tats d person i can talk to..at least he will un half half rather than none..but i dare not to talk bout it..
I losing my mind....I feel lik giving up all d guys n bac to zero......restart everything...coz i did something wrong??? no..coz it making me sad n depressed...
wat shud i do.....i nid some time..spend wit me sometime..I miss u so much tat i hope one day u will understand me n be with me always...I wont giv up on u..tats all i noe....I'm sry for wat i hav done but i luv u.